What to Wear - Normal,IL

Updated on January 23, 2008
A.G. asks from Normal, IL
13 answers

My grandfather died this weekend and i have to go to his wake and funeral, so what do you wear to the wake.

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V.S.

answers from Kansas City on

Most people wear business casual to a wake and then get more formal for the funeral. While dark colors are more traditional for the funeral, color is more acceptable for the wake.

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A.K.

answers from Springfield on

Oh, I am so sorry for your lose; however i am hoping the pain (if any) is gone and he is in a better place. For my grandmother's funeral this past June all the grandaughters had their toes painted pink and wore pink dresses...favorite color was pink. The men all wore pink ties with polka dots on them...her name was Dottie. See if you can personilize it for him. He would have loved it!!!!

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L.S.

answers from Decatur on

Wear something black. Black shoes and you will be fine. It could be a 2 piece skirt suit or pant suit. Black makes you look thin and looks like you knew just waht to wear.

Long jacket, put your hair up. Short jacket, leave your hair down. Dress warm, but stay in season.

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L.J.

answers from Wichita on

My father died this past year and we had a visitation, much like a wake, and then a funeral. I wore black slacks and a modest top, it wasn't black, but it wasn't loud either. Wakes can last a long time and are uncomfortable to begin with. You want something appropriate, but something that will allow you to be comfortable on and off your feet. My teen son wore a pair of cacky slacks and a polo shirt, tan and black, just to give you an idea. I'm really sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers to you and your family.

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L.D.

answers from Kansas City on

I've always worn black slacks and black turtleneck with black blazer for the wake and usually the same except with a skirt for the funeral. Depending on where you are and if there is a trip to the cemetary, you may want to wear trousers both days. The wake (at least in our family) tends to be a bit informal with lots of sitting around and telling great stories about the decedent. Wearing black isn't as big a thing now as it used to be, but it's always been my way to show respect. Subdued colors are always a must at funerals though.

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S.H.

answers from Wichita on

I would wear something similar to what you would wear at the funeral. Wear something nice.

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C.D.

answers from Bloomington on

You don't have to wear all black anymore. Just wear a simple dress (nothing low-cut or short) or dark pants and a sweater to the wake. If you are going to the funeral, you probably should wear a conservative dress.
Sorry about your Grandfather.

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S.G.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I'm sorry for your loss. You can wear what you would wear to church to the wake. Pants & a nice shirt or sweater would be fine. Colors are fine to wear to a wake.

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J.K.

answers from Champaign on

Wakes tend to be a bit more casual, due to the extent of time you spend there, where the funeral is the dressier event. So dress pants or khakis or corduroys with a sweater or nice top would be just fine.
If the family is going to the burial after the funeral (some do some don't), you might want to keep that in mind and wear dress pants instead of a dress/skirt or take a long warm dress coat as it is so cold right now.
Hope that helps!

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J.N.

answers from Kansas City on

A.,

I'm sorry for your loss. In the past I have worn dark clothes to funerals and wakes. However, if there was an outfit your Grandfather liked or a color he was fond of you might consider wearing that outfit as well. My Great Uncle liked Yellow roses, so his funeral the spray had yellow roses and all the ladies added a touch of yellow to their dresses. For my Grandmother's funeral I wore a dress she had liked. Just make sure you have shoes that fit the location. High heels and soggy grass are a bad combination.

J. N.

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D.P.

answers from Columbia on

A., I am sorry to hear of your loss. We just laid my grandfather to rest 12/29/07. I too was unsure of what to wear to the visitation and funeral, as I had not been to one in almost 12 years. I wore black slacks and a dark red sweater to the visitation and black dress slacks and a dark grey sweater to the funeral. Most of the other people wore tan/kaki pants and a nuteral or darker colored shirt to the visitation and dark pants with a darker colored shirt. I do not think there was one person there in all black. Very few women wore skirts/dresses as it was too cold. Those that I asked before going told me to wear what I feel comfortable in. They said black is not a must at visitations and funerals anymore. Not only are you there to morn the loss of your grandfather but also to remember the good times of him. If your grandfather was anything like mine he would have wanted you to wear what you felt most comfortable in rather than worry about what others thought of what you were wearing. If you would like someone outside of the 'family loop' to talk to please feel free to email me. (____@____.com) I know that is one thing that helped me. :)

Take care,
D.

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J.B.

answers from Kansas City on

I am so sorry for your loss. We just lost an aunt a few weeks ago and I just wore a pair of very dark dressy jeans with a black sweater and black boots. People don't dress up for funerals or even church like they use to anymore. Everyone will just be glad to see you and that you made it.

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C.B.

answers from Kansas City on

I am sorry to hear about your grandfather. I always wear dress pants and a nice shirt. This time of year a sweater or button-up shirt is great with Black pants or Khakis if you don't have black. Don't feel like you have to buy something fancy. The way I always feel is that the person who died wouldn't have cared what I had worn so I am not going to worry about what others think. C.

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