What Effective Things Have U Done to Teach Your Children to Pick Up?

I give my kids a warning. Then I pick it up and it goes into the garbage. They don't get it back. Doesn't matter what it is. If it's school related it goes to school and can't come back.

Well, you can tell them about two times and then it goes in the closet and they have to pay you for them back or if it is really bad you can give it away and they won't have it anymore. Worked for me kids.

N.

Recently, I reorganized and decorated our playroom. My 4 year old helped a lot-he helped pick the bins, placed them, and decided which toys to keep in each one. It's worked! 3 weeks later and he's stll picking up. I have to remind him and we have to sing the "clean up song" still, but he does it. It may also have something to do with the "toy fairy". Since he was tiny we told him that the Toy Fairy comes at night to take the toys that we do not take care of. She takes them to little boys and girls who need toys and WILL take care of them.
It's actually taught him a couple of things-he recieved a package in the mail from a friend out of town with toys he's outgrown. In his head, he decided they were from the toy fairy and Josh must not have been taking care of his toys. I didn't realize this until he set some toys in the middle of the living room one night before bed. He said that he didn't need those toys anymore and "Josh might want them-tell the toy fairy to give them to him." He does this every once in a while and gives his toys to kids who might need them and will take care of them. How cute is that!

We try and take 5-minute cleaning breaks every 2 or 3 hours. I'll put on a VERY energetic song and we scurry around and pick-up and put away anything we are not immediately playing/working with. If, at the end of the song, everything is not cleaned up, oh well, we'll get it next time.

Then, at the end of the day, when the children have been put to bed, I do a sweep of the house and pick-up whatever is left . . . and it becomes mine. I can do whatever I want with it. Throw it away, give it away or have the children work to earn it back. Funny thing though, sometimes, after seeing what I have in my box, they don't want it. So, this has also helped in the thinning of the toy herd.

One project at a time!...cant stress that enough, make it easier to clean up also, storage bins in every room (like a storage ottoman, or wicker basket that gos with your decor), toy boxes, little shopping carts. Have a "chore a day" list set up on the fridge. One thing i recently came up with was "the lazy box"...its a little rolling box she can fill up with stuff she doesnt feel like sorting, it can never overflow and must be emptied on a sunday. Her friends have to help her pick up, its a house rule. I think instilling a sense of order into children is a great thing, i know you have met the grown men and women whos mothers never bothered. They have trash dumps for cars and look like hoarders with their kitchen counters., lol.

If my daughter does not keep stuff clean ill exclaim, 'well i guess you have too much toys" i guess ill have to give some to children without any", this either gets one of two responses "no!.(...starts to frantically clean as a joke) or "Yes'',,,, then we decide what to donate. either way, the room gets alot cleaner.

I started my kids picking things up from a small age. It's not about rewards, it's about keeping the house clean and in order. If they want clean clothes then put them in the hamper, if they want to eat then set the table. Just every day stuff that has to be done in order to survive. Sounds like your on the right track, they just need to respect you and help. When they have their own place one day they will see why it was important while living at home. Congrats to you working with 4 kids, your awesome!

Kudos to you! Man you are busy!! I would love to tell you I have The Answer, but I don't. My 3 yr old won't pick up anything until she sees her 21 mo old sister doing it! Then she fights her sister to put the toys away herself! I emptied a lot of the toys from the toy box and rotate, so even if every toy is out of the box it's still not a horrible mess. I just try to tell them that before we move onto something else or go outside we have to clean up first. I tried threats, naughty step, none of it worked. My mother was right when she said I would get my paybacks for being a stubborn little kid! Now I have one! I try not to stress about it. Your kids won't remember how clean or messy your house was, just how much time you spent with them!

Best thing ever....Bag lady! 1 day a week (we do Monday because they have the weekend to clean up) I go through the house and put everything that isn't in it's place into a bag. Then it stays there for a week. Doesn't matter what it is. Clothes, homework, CD's, etc. Once or twice of something important to them getting taken by the bag lady and they are sure to pick up.
P.S. We work with the little ones on picking up with racing games, "I spy" and color games like let's get all the blues first then all the reds.

Good luck mighty mom!

I feel your pain! I school my 8 year old the same way, and also have a 4 year old. The two can really make a mess throughout the day. Every time I ask them to pick up the toys, I hear "but we have it all set up just how we want it, and we aren't done playing with it yet".
Here's what I do. When it is time to expect DH home from work, all the toys have to be removed from the main living and walking areas. Whatever accumulates on the island in the kitchen throughout the day gets placed on their placemats (so they have to put it away before eating). Everything else is part of the bedroom routine. One room at a time (including the yard), they walk through the house and make sure there is nothing left out. Their room must be cleaned before bed as well. If they can't do this all in a reasonable amount of time, then I just start the bedtime routine earlier the next night. The quicker they clean, the more story time they get.
Also, if I ask them to do something or clean up something and they don't, or put it off so long they forget, then I do it for them. After I have done it, I go tell them that since they forgot to pick up the books (or whatever), that I did it for them. In exchange, they get to do something to help me. The chore I choose takes longer than the original, and is more unpleasant. Emptying all garbages in the house, vacuuming, unloading the dishwasher, laundry, etc. I have found that most of the time, this method motivates them to get it done when asked. When it doesn't work that way, this method is still great because it eliminates the need to nag and makes my workload lighter.

I know something that has helped my 7 yr old pick up his room is to give them specific tasks...i.e. have them pick up their books, pick up their cars, pick up their crayons. Having them do this seems to keep them from getting as overwhelmed. I try to look at it from their point of view. If I was stuck in a room filled with laundry, would I want to sort it all out? No. But I would start somewhere, maybe grab all the colored clothes, then whites...etc. Since I've started this with him, he gets his room done a lot fast and a lot less tension between the two of us goes on. Also, I give him a set task for each project. This also helps him understand time (he knows how to tell time), but if your child doesn't grasp time yet, use a kitchen timer. These work wonders. Hope this helps!

How about when everyone is together, "Okay, 15 minutes, everyone pick up your stuff and put it away." Maybe even blast the radio while doing it? Things should be picked up before they move on to the next activity, and before bed. My sister went so far as to throw it away if they didn't pick it up. It seemed to work.

I go the mean consequences route. Whether I've been home or not, I announce, "I have to sweep/vacuum. Everyone has ten/fifteen/thirty minutes (depending on the mess) to clean up their stuff, and anything not picked up will be taken to Goodwill."

Then I give them updates... ten minutes left, etc., counting down the final minute second by second. I make sure, though, that I pick up my stuff, too!

Be prepared to get out a trash bag and pick up the extras. The first few times I had to work out ways for the kids to do chores to get a few things back out of the bag, but I haven't had to do this since. If someone isn't hustling, all they need to see is the white trash bag and they get going.

Good luck!

I had my kids running to pick up toys, it was crazy for me to see. Prior we'd have to threaten with a trash bag, and that didn't always work. We just started this and it's working. I got a roll of tickets (from the $1 store). For every toy, piece of paper etc... they picked up, I stood there and handed them tickets. Each ticket = 1 point. Then assign each reward a point level. My kids are into baloons, candy, things they don't get everyday. A trip to a special park, movies. You could use a sliding scale of free and non-free things they want.

I had an ah-ha moment recently regarding this. My kids are 7 and almost 5. Of course they are not going to pick up on their own. So, I realized that the best way to get them to do it is if they have to pick up BEFORE we move on to the next fun thing. I work from home too and the hardest part is taking time out to say..."okay kids, pick up your things in the living room and then join me in the kitchen for your snack" or whatever event you want to do next. I do this all day long (approx. 3-4 times a day) and really it takes less time for me to plan these "pick up and get" moments than it does to pick up after them. We are also super surprised how peaceful the home has become in under a week. The nagging, taking toys away, arguing, all of that can stop if you pick up throughout the day and before the next event. We still have moments of complaining, but I just remind them that I will not accept that and before we leave for X we need to pick up the playroom. If they see how quick it can be if you clean all rooms each day...the complaining gets so much less frequent. Good luck!!

One thing out at a time! Want a different toy to play with, then put the one you were playing with back in it's place and get a different one out!

No magic answer here, but some ideas I use here at my house . . . I have an allowance chart for weekly pay that each child starts at. When I am treated as a maid - i.e., toy or dish pick-up, I have assigned a particular amount (usually .10-.25, depending on the age of the child and the amount of their allowance) that is deducted per item I pick up. I am pretty consistent about it, and at the end of the week, when they don't get their full amount, they usually know why, and if not, I've written it on the board to show the deductions so they can see and track, and hopefully improve. It doesn't mean it always improves here; our house is in no way perfect and there is usually something lying around, but my hope is that someday they will figure out that in real life, they either need to take care of their belongings themselves or hire a maid to do it for them, and this costs money. If things are not picked up, about once a week, my husband and I give them a warning with a time limit, and whatever is not picked up is put in a box in the garage that they have to work for in order to get back.

We also use the Clean song but in the Spanish version, lol.
I read Lisa B. post and I love the "toy fairy", I think I would use that too.
For my 12 year old, she knows that she has to clean her room and take care of the dishes everyday. I let her pick what time she want to do it but they have to be done before 7pm. or she would lose her privileges BUT she still have to do the cleaning.
I also have a basket in the living room, sometimes I drop the stuff in there others I ask her to do it.
I have to say, I am very lucky with my kids, specially with my 12 year old, she helps a lot around but it wasn't always like that, I remember at 9-10, omg, I am so happy we move on finally from that phase!

My daughter is 8 & a half right now, I am learning what motivates her. because she is an only child & smart enough to pick up after herself. I have stopped buying things that are not a necessity and will only reward her with a big gift after we have tracked that she has done the few easy chores I ask her to do with a good attitude. I always poor on the praise after she completes the chore good or bad attitude and let her know how much it helps me.

I agree with the other two posts. You are on the right track. Good for you for expecting your kiddos to help out too. I know a few parents that are worn OUT because they do all of the picking-up and cleaning.

Kids love consistency, so try one way that works the best for YOU to keep track of (rewards, charts, etc). But be consistent. Is there a reward at the end? Or is there a punishment if it's not done? I think maybe BOTH should happen. My 2 yr old: If he picks up his toys, he gets a treat or gets whatever it is that he wants at that moment - to go outside or new batteries in his toy. If he doesn't pick up his toys, he gets something taken away or might get a spanking. Our "GOLDEN RULE" at our house is "LISTEN and OBEY."

Good luck