Making Friends

Updated on March 05, 2008
M.D. asks from Chipley, FL
19 answers

How do i help my daughter make friends? She is not shy, 5 years old, no school yet, late b-day,and we live way out in the woods. I put her in dance class, and try to talk to other moms but they just drop there kids off and leave. ANY ideas ? ? ?
Thanks :0)

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F.R.

answers from Pensacola on

you may want to consider a brownie or girl scout troop. The parents for that activity are much less likely to drop their kids off and leave. It's a wonderful organization that tries to involve the entire family.
Don't worry much, she'll be in school before you know it and she'll start getting the birthday invitations almost monthly. Right now just be confident that you know who her best friends are (you and the rest of the family). She isn't missing much that she can't gain later on.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.C.

answers from Daytona Beach on

The only thing I can suggest is making friends with other moms of kids her age; take her to the library story times; join local playgroups.

I'm afraid I never concerned myself with my children "making friends" .. I have 5 kids.. they have built in friends LOL

M.
Mom to 5 kids ages 4-22

More Answers

T.J.

answers from Fort Walton Beach on

This isn't much of a solution... I have the same problem too. I just moved to this area about 1 1/2 ago and I have no friends besides the sitter. I work with two other girls, but they don't live close by at all. One is an hour away. So I can't hang out with them. We are trying to find a couple that has kids to hang out with but it's so hard down here. It's hard to hang out with the sitter since she is around my kids all the time as it is. We have somethings in common, but not much.

Good Luck!

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D.W.

answers from Gainesville on

I found my moms group on meetup.com so I second that!

1 mom found this helpful
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L.M.

answers from Tallahassee on

Hi

I also have a daughter that was very shy at the same age as your girl. Maybe a little party to ask some of the girls her age from the dance class that she goes to. Maybe a fun tea party or just a little girl get together to get to know some of the other girls and Moms also.

Just an idea from a Mom who also had a shy daughter.

L. in Ga.

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P.F.

answers from Fort Walton Beach on

I spend as much time as I can with my children, ages 9,7,and 5. We attend church, and they're friends are in Sunday School. WE try to make playdates as we are able. Sometimes the fever of friends comes and I try to make sure we get some play time. But other wise I am in the same boat! I live in the woods! Ssame town, matter of fact. LOL

1 mom found this helpful

K.B.

answers from Jacksonville on

I would second the playgroup idea. This is a great way to find other moms going thru what you are, and a great way for your daughter to build friendships with others. Yahoo! Groups and Meetup.com have some good groups on there...:)

Local playgrounds may have some great parents and kids that you can meet. Start up a conversaion with the parents of whichever child your daughter is playing with. You never know! :)

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R.B.

answers from Daytona Beach on

I try to take my son to places where I know there will be parents and children. For example: to the park, the mall play place, the YMCA, the pool, beach, community events, church and any where that I know children and parents will be together. Usually I end up meeting nice parents that I become friends with and they usually have children that my son becomes friends with. So my son and I have made many friends like that. It just takes time and effort. Hope this helps... :)

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P.B.

answers from Orlando on

try going to the local library events. you could see if the other children's friends have siblings of a similar age to your 5 year old.

1 mom found this helpful
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N.E.

answers from Daytona Beach on

Hi M.,
Do you live in Palm Coast? My friends and I have play dates every Thursday from 10-12. Sometimes we go to the park and eat lunch and sometimes we go to Let's Play and we get a discount. It is great for the kids and also for the moms. If you aren't in the PC area, I would maybe sugguest looking online in your area that may have play groups or mom groups.

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B.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

I feel for you, my family and I are travelling through North America. I am home schooling my 12 and 8 year old. We stay in once place about a month before we move on (we leave Orlando next week). I get how it is difficult to meet people. I have to make a HUGE effort.

If we are at the pool, I am very forward is starting a converstaion. I simply walk up to people say something about kids usually. We either talk or we don't. If we don't, I change seats.

When we are at a park or something like that, I talk to anyone and everyone. At least once a day I find someone who is a bit lonely like me to talk with. Sometimes it is only for that day, but about 75% of the time, I find a new friend and we email or chat online.

And I completely agree with www.meetup.com. I join groups in every city I visit.

I will tell you straight up, people are busy, they are rushing, they think have no time for themselves or for new friends. It is up to you to show them how easy a new friendship can be.

Keep me posted!

B.
www.HeyYouGetreal.com
____@____.com

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N.D.

answers from Jacksonville on

Well M., sounds like you have your handsful with so many children, LOL. However, I think inviting kids over to your house would help, also you could put her in a Summer Camp program at a daycare, or even a parttime daycare. Putting her in dance was an excellent idea as well. Otherwise I wouldn't worry too much since Kindergarten is just around the corner. When I was your daughter's age I too lived out in the woods, Michigan. I am sure she will be fine, this is good for her imagination and having her become more independent. More of a leader than a follower. How are your other children doing with the farm/woods life? Where do you live? Do you go to church? Good Luck N.

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C.S.

answers from Jacksonville on

Dont worry! I grew up in B.F.E. I went to private school and none of my friends pareents would bring their child to my house because it was too far away. I took lots of dance, softball,ect.. Today i am much more comfortable just with myself, and have found that it is rare. Everyone has always liked me a bunch but I tend to keep a distance and my friends are just a few because I am very selective. I could only dream of raising my children that way. It is truley a blessing. Dont be concerned!

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P.E.

answers from Panama City on

Teach her to be happy and helpful. My 23 yr old has the same problem because her IQ Is above 160 and she wants everyone to know she is smart and better. This is a major friend looser attitude. Your 5 yrold has to be around people to make friends. If she has a mental problem be sure she takes her meds. If she is a happy fun loving child people will flock to her.

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M.A.

answers from Orlando on

M.

I would suggest the following - church sunday school, brownies or if available in your neck of the woods public play grounds. You have to go at the same time, same day in order to let the children build friendships.

Also, I would suggest hosting a party for her dance class, something just for fun - tea party, dress up or a treasure hunt as you live in the woods. Invite the "drop off" moms too!

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C.C.

answers from Orlando on

M.,

I just attended a great seminar called " Love and Logic " at Lake Forrest Prep School. It was about how to parent your children in the right way to make them responsible children. They do have a website- LoveandLogic.com that you could try. Also the school is offering this class to people outside of the school as well...its $25.00 ( workbook included )the next class is April 12th. Anyway, after attending this seminar I learned that it's not your responsibility to help your child make friends its hers, however you can give her ideas on how you would go about making friends, but it will have to be up to her to do it. This class was amazing...I highly recommed it for anyone.

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L.W.

answers from Orlando on

Make her playdates with some of the other kids in class. Invite people over to your house. . Go to whatever you can with her and strike up other conversations with moms. When wemoved here I had to be a little on the aggresive side to make sure my son had some kids to play with. DO you go to a church? They often have Sunday schools, or moms groups. From dance class, is there any little girl that she talks about or seems to like? Ask the teacher if she could point out the mom, go to the mom, and say, "My daughter mentions how muchshe admires yours daughters pirouet (or whatever) would she like to come over to play? " feel the mom out, she may want to meet with you first to make sure your okay. You will have to take the initiative, and be willing to have kids over, or take them to the movies, or whatever, to get her with some little girls, to get a chance to form some bonds.
Good luck.

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R.L.

answers from Orlando on

Try to find a playgroup or a MOPS group through a church. The malls usually have some sort of moms club deal too that meet one a month in the mornings with entertainment for the kids. Good luck!

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T.A.

answers from Daytona Beach on

Hi M.
Do any of your friends have children her age? If so, invite that mom over with her child for lunch. Let the kids meet and play. I live out in the woods in Deleon Springs, moved from DeLand. When I got divorced and had to move, I did not want to live in apartments where I couldn't regulate who my son played with. So it's perfect out here where I was able to invite my hand-picked friends' children to come camp out, play, eat,etc. But if you don't have any friends with children, I know there's a site meetup.com where they have groups of mom meet for coffee with their kids. they're everywhere. Good luck

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