Desperate for Advice! - Lufkin,TX

If you can't afford to pay basic bills, you can't afford a baby. Take over paying the bills, get a budget in place, get some advice such as Dave Ramsey or another financial advisor and start following it. You both have to be in agreement for anything financial to work. Good luck.

DaveRamsey.com. Total Money Makeover. Both people in a marriage need to be a part of the money handling. You can also listen to Dave on the radio in most parts of the country or online for free.

A lot of people have offered great advice, I would just be adding more of the same.

But, I wanted to share a personal observation to help you:

You mentioned that you both have full-time jobs, but not always money in the bank. Unless your full-time jobs only pay $10/hour, you should be able to pay bills & provide necessities for yourselves without problems each month.

If you cannot, then you are either 1. Living outside your means (mortgage is too high, car payments for a brand-new high end car, etc.) or 2. You are spending money on wants as well as needs.

Prior to this year, my husband & I should have been living VERY comfortably. We had a home with an affordable mortgage (1/5 of our monthly take-home pay), we are conservative with our energy & water, & we don't carry credit card debt, nor have student loans or car payments.

However, because we had money, we spent money. A LOT of money. Going out to eat instead of making dinners/lunches @ home. Every day. See it, want it, buy it. Lots of money on equipment for hobbies that we didn't pursue long term. You get the picture...

In January, I quit my good paying job, & went back to school full-time. Which cut our income in HALF. So we tightened the belt. No more going out. Make a list before going shopping. Engage in the activities we already have supplies for. Etc.

Imagine my surprise when I checked our bank account last month, & found out we had a couple of THOUSAND dollars excess, while paying our bills!!

Turns out, we didn't need to spend the money we had been, at the level we were spending. We chose to do so, because we thought it was fulfilling our needs. But instead, it was just draining our ability to save, & afford more high-end, long term items.

There are families of 4 who get by on 35K a year. With a roof over their heads in a decent neighborhood, food on the table every night, & the ability to participate in hobbies as a family.

So a lot of managing your money, when you have good jobs & easily enough funds to afford your necessities, is not so much "budgeting" as it is making the decisions between NEED and WANT.

Cable is a WANT. Cell phones (in today's day & age) are more of a NEED, but not necessarily the high-end smartphone packages.
Cars are a NEED in most cases, but a 5-yr old paid in full car will usually do just as well as a brand new, hundreds-each-month in payments car.
Food is a NEED, but going out to eat more than once or twice a month (for date night, because keeping the romance in your relationship is a NEED), is a WANT.

See the difference?

And I KNOW, it's really hard to see the differences until you are forced to sometimes, because you technically probably have the money to continue to satisfy your wants... but think long-term. Babies? Bigger house? Minivan? Kitchen upgrade? Vacations? Make your wants more worthwhile, long-lasting & beneficial to yourselves overall, & sacrificing the short-term wants won't be as hard.

So when you go through your bank account statements for the last 6 months, tally up the expenditures in buckets (utilities, groceries, gas, dining out, other entertainment, credit card/car/student loan payments, etc) & see where the biggest chunks are hitting, & what you can scale back.
And then, make one long-term goal together, that you can work towards, so that you feel good about eliminating some of your current wants.

Paws crossed that you & your husband can have an open dialogue & come to agreement on what needs to be done!! T.

K.:

I'm sorry. You BOTH need to be held accountable for the bills.

Getting your electricity and water shut off is a HUGE deal. This isn't just being a month late...it takes several months of non-payment here in VA for them to shut off your electric and/or water.

Go to the library and get some books by Dave Ramsey or Suze Orman on financial management. You MUST take control of your finances instead of letting them control you.

BOTH OF YOU need to pull your heads out of the sand and get to work on being financially fit.

Have a garage sale and get rid of ANYTHING you have not touched in six months. donate what doesn't sell. Keep a detailed list of what you donated for a tax write off. Apply any and all the money from the garage sale to outstanding bills.

Make sure your W4 With holdings are correct and not taking too much out in taxes. So you can have more money in your account.

Get a calendar that you can write on - and mark when bills are due, when you get paid. Then you make sure they are paid BEFORE they are due.

Find out how much you owe on credit cards...what have you put on them? Really - when you calculate the interest you are paying on the items - was it worth the extra money you paid for it?

Get rid of your credit cards. Start by going CASH ONLY.

Use coupons for your groceries.
Make a menu for the week and buy off what you NEED - not WANT.
Make one day a week leftover night so you don't throw away food.
Take your lunches to work. That will save you $400 a month - $50 a week x 2 - $400.

Try reading this link
http://www.gerberlife.com/gl/view/newsletter/oct09/articl...

I'm sorry to say - if you guys can't get your bills together NOW - you are NOT ready to have babies...they are a HUGE responsibility and cost A LOT OF MONEY.

You need to work on it TOGETHER...DO NOT fight over money. DO NOT stick your head in the sand over it either. Work together. LISTEN to each other and get it done TOGETHER. If you can't do that? Then you need to go to marriage counseling and learn how to communicate with each other and get on the same page with finances.

We have a his, mine and ours. We are cash only. We balance the checkbook the first Monday of every month. TOGETHER.
We have "fun money" that goes into each of our separate accounts. When that's done? You're done...if you have leftover ? GREAT!! Yours to keep. You don't have to account for that money. It's "fun" money.

There is so much more to tell you.

Good luck!

You started a family when you got married. You and your husband are family.
You can't add more to the family until you can afford them..... MORE than "just" afford them, you need tone stable.... Financially, maritally, emotionally etc.

Dems da rulz.

You need to know what bills you have and when they are due. You also need to track the income vs outgo for your household.

Your husband's reaction suggests that he might be hiding something from you. Maybe something major, or maybe he is just embarrassed that he can't do the job alone.

The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey is an easy read that will walk you through budgeting and such. It emphasizes that both people in a marriage jointly handle the money.

There is no way in HECK that I'm putting money into an account where I don't have the online password.

You might want to see if a church in your area is doing the Financial Peace class that Dave Ramsey created. That would be a great start for you guys imho.

Knowing what I know now, I would *not* have kids with someone where I wasn't basically in sync with what we're doing financially. Money problems are one of the biggest causes of divorce.

Good luck.

To get your phone and power turned off, you must have not paid them for 2-3 months, not just missing a payment by 10 days. That's a big deal. And you both work full-time but have no kids, and can't keep things turned on? PLEASE do not start a family until you both get your ducks in a row.

Even if neither of you make much, there is no reason things shouldn't be paid on time. I am going to ASSUME the money is going to other things (clothes, cars, eating out, etc)...stop that. Bills come FIRST.

Please do not even think about kids until you and your husband (a) can manage money like adults and (b) have started saving money, not just paying bills that clear out your accounts AND put you into credit card debt. Parents cannot "manage" money that way.

Having a child, even a welcome and wanted child, adds stress to a relationship. If you are already in money trouble -- and you are in big trouble, you do realize that -- having a child will make things worse, not better. Babies cost money. Tell yourself that constantly. Even if you have insurance to cover all the medical stuff, you will be shocked at what you end up spending even if you are very frugal.

Before you have any kids, you need to step up and take over the finances, and your husband needs to get over his ego. It's his ego telling him that he must be in control of the money, he should not want to hand over passwords, etc. He. Must. Get. Over. That. If he cannot, you have a much larger problem with his wanting to control things, and that is a problem to get solved before any kids are involved.

Others are recommending books etc. and that's fine but I'd also check with your bank to see if it offers free financial counseling and can help you with personal finances. There should be no reason you cannot do better, unless you both work the lowest-level minimum wage jobs. Re-read Tara's post!

I read your post the other day about a miscarriage and so I am writing this response with that in mind as well as your issues about money. There are some terrific comments/suggestions already posted by others on budgeting and cutting costs, as well as distinguishing wants from needs. So I'm not going to add to that even though I agree with most of it.

You say that you are both young, and that's showing. He thinks, as the man, he's better at bills? Apparently not because bills are clearly going for months and months without being paid. Service is not cut off because you're late or you skip a month. These bills must have been 3-4 months behind at the minimum, and multiple late notices were issued, which your husband did not tell you about if you were surprised by the cut in service.

Secondly, you are politely asking him for access to your marital money! What? Why is he in charge? Why is your financial situation a secret from you? The only reasons I can think of are that 1) your husband is incredibly uneducated or incompetent about bill paying, 2) you are both living way beyond your means or 3) he's hiding something from you. You must get to the bottom of it immediately. If he won't level with you or if you don't understand these things, you must take precautions immediately to protect yourself from increased debt and a terrible (even worse than now) credit rating. These are SO hard to recover from.

For starters, give up any plans to get pregnant again until this is resolved. You absolutely cannot bring a child into a home with insufficient income, with no electricity (or food or rent or insurance), and with dishonesty/secrecy between spouses. A baby, no matter how wanted, does not fix anything in a marriage, nor does a baby make a new parent decide to change and behave himself. So if you are thinking that your husband will suddenly become responsible, please change your thinking right away.

Secondly, you need to have your paycheck go into a separate account in your name only and ideally in a different bank than the one you are using for your joint account. You need to cancel credit cards and get your name off everything you can so that your husband cannot further ruin your credit rating. If the electricity and phones were affected, it's quite likely that your rent/mortgage, car payments, and IRS obligations are also in arrears.

Next, you need to find out where the money is going. You need a good accountant and financial advisor. It's fine to get the books suggested by other posts, in order to educate yourself. But your situation is way beyond your ability to fix it yourself. I know you think you cannot afford this, but you cannot afford NOT to do it. If you are living beyond your means, there are some simple but effective steps to take. If your husband is concealing things from you, that is incredibly dangerous for your future, so you must get to the bottom of it. At this point. anything he tells you is suspect. At best, he's in over his head. At worst, he's deceptive.

Maybe he's lying, maybe he's trying to protect you, but it's a horribly ineffective strategy and it's an abject failure. You need, in my view, an objective third party to sort this out, make some graphs for you to show you what percentage of your money goes to what, and which things are way out of whack.

Please do this immediately. Good luck.

Get on the same page and set a budget now. At the very least, compile a list of your current bills and current income (net so you know how much you actually have not just what you earned). Then you will see what you have left and can decide on how much to save and know what your true disposable income is.

I find it VERY suspicious you dont know the password and he is reluctant to give it to you. If he has not already given you the password, he is hiding something. No, I do not think that in 2013 there is a man who is that hung up on only the man pays the bills. Do you have a credit card in your name only? You dont have to use it much, and make sure you pay it off Every single month, but you do need to establish good credit in your name in case he continues to be irresponsible with money, he can easily ruin both his and YOUR credit. Be careful.

You're not READY to start a family because with just the two of you, you don't have your finances in order and you don't even know anything about your budget or finances. You're not involved in paying bills and you don't even have the bank accounts? Not good. Not good at all.

If you're going to plan for a child then you ideally need to have your bills in order AND you should have money in savings "for a rainy day." You should have retirement accounts set up for yourselves (separately). You should have college accounts set up for each child.

If you can't afford to pay for electricity or food or other basic bills then you can't afford "a baby." It's not just a baby you'd "have." You would be taking on an incredible amount of stress and additional bills that you couldn't afford.

This means that you MUST become involved in the daily running of the house. That includes creating and following a daily household budget. You have to be involved in following the bills and being able to pay for them from a joint account. You also need to be sure to be able to keep track of any accounts... have online access as well as view paper documents. You have to be able to keep track of all or most of your bills online. Most companies these days give you the option to go paperless... that means you can view and pay your bills online to make sure that they're on time. If you can't pay something on time, you can at least schedule a payment or a partial payment showing good faith.

You can't blame your husband for this. You're an adult, and that means you're responsible for this mess too. I suggest you put your own paycheck into your own checking and savings account. Get in touch with a financial adviser. It's time to take over the finances since your husband won't do it.

For many men, Money = Power. By letting go of that power, he sees himself as weaker, or worse, a failure.

First things first, you NEED a budget. Everyone should have a budget because, as you have experienced, just checking your bank account doesn't cut it.

There are many systems out there for getting and keeping a budget, closing your eyes and hoping for the best is not one of them. You can look at your local library for source or see if there is free financial counseling in your area.

Good luck

WOW! Look at what Tara wrote!

She did a wonderful job. I could restate what she said, but it is unnecessary.

I can only add that my wife and I save the fast food coupons we find in the Wednesday sale ads. Then we use those to go out to eat most of the time (once or twice per month). We occasionally go out to eat at a nice sit-down restaurant, but that is rare. What I noticed is that we spend at least $35 at the sit-down restaurants and less than $5 at the fastfood restaurants when we use their coupons.

This is July and I think we've gone to a sit down restaurant 3 times so far this year. I know people that go twice or more each week. You can go on a week long cruise for $700 or less (much less if you book within 90 days of sailing.)

Both our cars are paid for. Mine is 10 years old and my wife's is 11 years old. They work fine and I anticipate using them until they die. We saved the payments, after they were paid off, in an account where the money is invested so when we need anther car, we can pay cash.

Good luck to you and yours.

Ah, one of the biggest marriage annihilators MONEY!! one of the top three reasons for divorce...

It is good you are asking for an open book as far as money goes that you both have access to the bank accounts and money management files.

You will need to sit down and make a budget...pull out all your bills...and if you can't find them then that is problem number one.

A thing I learned from my aunt is to get a three ring binder and a hold punch...as soon as the bill comes in put it in the binder!! (Also a set of dividers marked by month is also helpful).

We get paid bimonthly the 1st and 15th...so in the front of my binder I have a list of bills due the first and fifteenth of the month. (Those due between the 1st and 14th then those due between the 15th and 31st). I found out we were flush the first half of the month and broke the second half because of when certain bills were due (I called the companies and arranged the due dates on two bills to be shifted closer to the first of the month and it evened out our cash flow. The list also allows me to make sure that we have received a statement for each bill that month (once I had our eclectic company stop sending a bill for two months we still owed them but never got a statement...I was able to call and get the balance and send payment) without my list I might not have caught it. And wham, we would have been without power.

Then sit down and make that budget...include all bills even those you only pay twice a year or once a year...give yourselves an allowance (spending money you can both use without asking)...get that out in cash each payday...when the cash is gone so it your fun money.

Work on it together, make a plan and stick with it...make sure to include savings because that money will save you so many times...unexpected dental issues or car repairs or emergency trips, etc...

I use on-line banking with our bank and it really really helps me to see it all on the screen...our checking account and saving and retirement and everything all in one place.

The library will have plenty of easy to use books on budgeting and money management...Dave Ramsey is a god author to look up. Good luck and ask any questions you might have there are a lot of smart money people on this board.

Well, OBVIOUSLY he can't handle it better than you because your bills aren't paid on time. To me, it sounds like it's a power thing or he's hiding something. I think you have 3 choices:

1. You take over all the bill paying and give him a cash-only allowance that he can spend however he wishes.

2. You come together and write up a budget you agree on and is realistic and then BOTH stick to it!!

3. You get your own checking account and then split up the bills fairly. Meaning, if you make half of what he does then you are responsible for half of the total amount in bills.

For my husband and I, a variation on option 1 works best. I take care of making sure the bills are paid on time and in full, then let him know what our disposable income is for that pay period. He doesn't get an "allowance", but is aware of what we can spend frivolously (and let me tell you, it's not that much! lol) and sticks to it. He isn't interested in the money managing and it stresses him out, so I do it. I don't love it, but I DO like knowing all our financial info.

Your husband isn't being fair keeping you in the dark when you want to know your finances. And because you share your money, you have every right to know where every dollar is going.

Wild Woman gave great advice. Another addition-budgeting is huge! Take a look at the bills of the month and between each of your paychecks what bills will be paid with what paycheck and on what day. You can negotiate due dates with some companies. Call and ask. If you get paid bi weekly vs. bi monthly, it can make a difference paying on time. As for the password to banking, you should know it as a necessity. If something happens to him and ends up out of state/hospital, etc. you need access.

It is time to have a real talk about family finances and make a plan. You have both been under a lot of stress lately. And some of these financial problems may be due to stress and lack of focus. Some might be do to unorganization and the lack of a spending plan. Dave Ramsey is a financial advisor that has lots of easy to understand budgeting methods. He has a radio show and a website with lots of information that is free and other material you can purchase. Check and see what your local library has. Also many local churches offer his program Financial Peace University which might benefit you to. Good luck!

Do you and your husband have a joint account? If you do, you don't need to wait for your husband to give you the password. All persons named in the joint account can create an online account under their own individual, unique username. If you don't have a joint account, I suggest you open one ASAP.

It is important to be in this together so you can make it work.

If you believe you would be the better banker in the house and he is ok with that, then do it and be very detailed with it. You do need a budget.

Debt is evil... Do anything and everything to stay out or get out of debt. If you are already facing your utilities being cut off, etc then you are in the midst of destroying what credit you have.

Hubby and I are both big numbers people, detailed and organized, especially with finances. We do own our own company and I do all the financials of personal and our company.

Not 1 day goes by that I don't sign into my bank accounts at least once. I reconcile almost daily and I know where each penny goes.

When you are in the beginning process of this you have to think about a few things. Delayed gratification is your friend. Sit down together with all of your financials, incoming bills, due dates, etc. Make a budget and stick to it. If you can do this (YES it is hard if you are not accustomed to being financially savvy) then you will make baby steps to get ahead.

Don't get frustrated... it does not happen all at once. You must take baby steps. If possible, put off starting a family until you have a few months at least of being on this new plan and saving for your new addition. Children are expensive... think about all the supplies, etc you need plus the added costs of insurance, medical and saving for college and retirement.

Some people rely one someone with techniques to teach you how to do thigs such as Dave Ramsey. I am not familiar with all of his plans but iI do know he has helped a lot of people. You do NOT need to go buy one of his books. Go borrow one from the library.

You can do it... baby steps. Good luck

I agree that you guys need to work out your finances before having a baby. Financial stress is one of the leading causes of divorce, so make sure you two are on the same page regarding your finances and that you have discussed your goals and created a budget that works.

Read DAVE RAMSEY'S Total Money Makeover!!! It will be very useful in helping you to get out of debt, stay out of debt, create a budget that works, and save money for the future! (He also has a radio show and podcasts that can be informative)

It is very important that there be no secrets and total transparency in a marriage when it comes to your money. The bank account is both of yours and you should both have the password. The fact that your husband wants to be in charge of this and not let you see what is going on is a big problem that needs to be changed. I think at this point in your life (being very young and just starting out) your huge priority is to be as frugal as possible and get your finances in order. Both of you are working full time. You need to make your number one priority paying off any debts you have (school loans, credit cards, your car). Do not buy stuff right now. Do not buy cute clothes. Do not go out to eat. Do not do take out. Look at what you are paying for each month and cut back...what do you really need? Can you live somewhere that costs much less a month? Can you live with only one car and one of you takes the bus or rides their bike? To save money in our 20s we worked very, very hard. At first everything we made went towards paying off student loans. We went to graduate school at this time and worked crazy hours. We did not own a car for a while and eventually bought one car which we shared. We still only own one car and now we are in our 40s! We do not do TV - so no monthly payment. We do not have a home phone - just cell phones and my husband's job pays for his. So one phone payment. Be very careful with going out - lots of young people like to go out with friends, get some beers, order appetizers, go out for fancy coffee, eat lunch out, etc. This is a huge sink on your money. Try not to be a consumer. You don't really need all that cute stuff that the marketers are trying to suck you in to buy all the time. Think about people who live in poverty in a 3rd world country every time you are about to buy something...think to yourself do I really need this? The kids I volunteered helping in Zimbabwe had one (maybe two) outfits total to wear. The family I made friends with who were more "middle class" there had just a small small fraction of the clothes we Americans think we need. Be careful not to waste money by buying processed foods at the grocery store. Junk food and pre-cooked or convenience foods are all so over priced. Save money on groceries by eating simply and making meals from scratch. I usually get a whole chicken each week and can make 3 meals from it (roast chicken, chicken enchiladas, chicken noodle soup, chicken green chile casserole, chicken salad sandwiches, salad with cold chicken on top, etc). If your jobs make so little that you cannot pay your bills with both of you working something is very wrong. You need to either get better jobs (so perhaps you need to learn new skills?) or you are spending too much on things in life. Think of it like boot camp for the next 5 years...be very strict with yourself. With both of you working full time you should be able to pay your bills without a problem. I don't know if anything I said is helpful or not, but I hope so. PS - I have found in life that often the female is much better at managing money than the male (not to generalize).

If you have a joint checking account, you can both have your own personal login - username and password - to access the account. So go online tomorrow and see if you can sign up.

It is absolutely unacceptable for him to be dishonest about the finances. To pay the bills on time, you have two choices:
1. Pay them the day they arrive
2. Schedule a specific day each month to sit down together and pay the bills and review the monthly finances

You also need to find a way to save some money. Look for ways to cut expenses in your day to day life. Don't eat out, bring lunch to work, opt for a smaller cable package or cheaper internet or smaller cell phone package. Choose a certain amount each month, even if it's only $50, to automatically deduct from your checking account to a savings account.

If you don't always have money in the bank, you need to make major changes now. If one of you isn't working, get a job immediately. Look for ways to earn a little extra money on the side - do odd jobs for neighbors, get a second job, etc.

Don't start a family until you figure this out. If you can't afford to pay your electricity bill, you can't afford diapers (not to mention everything else that comes along with a baby).

You could always have your paycheck deposited into your own account, then you take over paying the bills that are important to you (electric, phone) but it's better if you both are fully engaged in solving this together.
You should know what you both are bringing in so you can determine how much you can spend.
If you're spending more than what you make - that's a problem.
You want to live well within your means, and that means you should be saving some money to build up as a nest egg out of every paycheck.
Figure out how much you spend on on everything then see if there are any areas that you can reduce - shop with coupons, don't buy anything unless it's on sale, shop for clothes in consignment stores, is there a more cost effective phone plan, etc.
Try to get to a point where you pay off credit card debt every month.
Get the bill paying figured out (try to pay them soon as you receive them) so your credit rating score doesn't suck - this will come in handy when it's time to buy a car or house.
Money (or lack of it) is always something couples will argue over - so keep the communication open and discuss it with your husband often - more than once per week.
Many people recommend Dave Ramsey books for advice on how to manage your finances.
It would be worth it for you (and hubby) to read them.

If he were to change the password so that you can't get in, you have an alternative to having to depend on him giving you the password. Go to the bank and tell your banker that you would like to open your OWN online access to the account. You do it through YOUR email address. The banker will walk you through it. After you get home, you need to go in with your username and password and it will ask you some personal questions to prevent someone who is not YOU from using your user name and password. Make sure you do that.

Sit down and list every bill that comes in your house, K.. Write down the time of the month that they are due. Write out the checks for them and have them ready to mail. Before you mail each check, go online and see what the account looks like so that you don't bounce a check.

I would not let your husband have the bills. He is doing a terrible job managing the finances. You cannot start a family with terrible credit, and I promise you that's what you all have - bad credit, thanks to your husband.

You both work fulltime, K.. You do NOT have to let him continue this. He isn't your boss. Take this over now without even talking about it with him. Pay the bills. When he asks where such-and-such bill is, tell him you already paid it. If he fusses, stand your ground. Tell him that the late payments are decimating your family credit and you are going to remedy it. Stand up for yourself, K.. His irresponsibility is hurting your credit and you don't have to put up with it.

It's hard when a couple is young. The young husband wants to be the "man" of the house, but if he isn't mature enough, makes a mess of it with poor financial decisions. The young wife wants to let her husband handle things. Between these two, lots of problems arise. It's best to work on this NOW before you two have children. Establish that you are an equal partner in this marriage and make him accept it. You don't have to live with a man who won't take care of the bills and won't let you take care of them.

Good luck, and I hope this helps!

Sit down with hubby with a notebook and a couple of pens. Talk to him about how you'd like to work together to see where all the money is going.

Ask him to help you make a list of all the monthly bills. He gets a couple of sheets of paper and so do you.

Start out with the obvious ones, rent/house payment. Is it taken out of anyone's pay check before they are paid, like with a credit union.

The electric bill, how much was it last year for this month. If you don't know look online at the electric company or call them and ask.

The gas bill, is your heat, stove, or hot water based on natural gas. If it's never been cut off you can probably get it averaged out over the year, average monthly billing.

Car payments, car insurance, gasoline, oil changes, tires, inspections, cleaning it out and washing it, all those little things that can eat away at your money.

Anything else that comes during the month like going to the laundry mat or buying groceries....

Each month on payday you both sit down and look at the bills that you have. You decide which bill has to come out of "this" payday. Is the electric bill due on the first and it's late by the 5th> if the rent is due out of the same paycheck you may not have enough money in that pay period. You may need to negotiate with the electric company to get your billing cycle changed to one that is later in the month. We can pick the first week, the second week, or the third week of the month. Some people, like teachers, only get paid once per month so they need their bills right at the beginning. Some of us have house payments out of the first check of the month then the car payment and utilities out of the second.

Then there are some that get paid every week and the partner gets paid every other week. This works nicely because every other week you have a high pay week. That covers almost all the bills.

Once you decide what bill is going to be paid and how the others will be paid you know how much money is left, if any, and you can decide if there is enough to do anything extra.