Am I Paying Too Little or Too Much?

Updated on February 13, 2008
S. asks from Dallas, TX
13 answers

We have used a friend's nanny one day a week for a couple of years, from 8:30 - 12 p.m. She used to stay until 2 p.m., and we paid her $60. When she cut her stay back to 12 p.m., we continued to pay her $60. She does laundry and watches my toddler (although she never plays with her or takes her outside). Recently, I had surgery, and she offered to stay with us the week I got home, from 8:30 - 5 p.m. most days. Some were shorter. When we paid her at $12 per hour, she complained and said she was doing much more work than usual and we really should pay her more. I did increase her check substantially, but felt very manipulated. My husband was flat-out angry. Now she is coming on her usual Monday at $60, and one other day at $12 per hour. She really doesn't do that much...and as my husband pointed out, what else would she be doing during that time anyway? Sitting? Watching tv?

We are a one income family, and we don't live a luxurious life. I feel like we're paying too much as it is. I certainly don't think we are under paying her! But I don't know - can anyone out there give me some perspective on this? I would love to get paid $12 an hour for the kind of work she is doing! Some professionals don't earn this much. Thanks for any input.

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So What Happened?

I really appreciate all the input! You've given me such a reality check - now I can't believe I got suckered into paying her $60 for 3 1/2 hours work (Mondays)! Now that I've heard the same general response from so many people, I think I will sit down with her and talk it out. I'll let her decide if she wants to continue working for us at a rate of $10 per hour or find another position, but I will keep her until the end of May at the current rate. That will give her time to make other arrangements without putting her in a bad spot unexpectedly. I am definitely going to stop using her more than once a week, though. We thought with my broken leg I would need more help, but I'm actually becoming quite mobile and handy! Thanks again, to everyone who wrote. I love having other viewpoints! And I'm surprised to see the range of locale - I'm in Dallas and thought we'd only be communicating with mamas in the metroplex. It's kind of nice to hear what's relevant in Houston, Austin, etc.

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A.K.

answers from Dallas on

I was a nanny full or part-time for about 20 years and I think you're paying her too much. I just can't believe she actually complained. Let her find a new job somewhere else where she can take advantage of people like that. Don't let her take advantage of you- what is that showing your kids? I've made as much as $12/hour, but I actually played with the kids, took them outside or fun places, did the laundry, cooked, etc. I would look for someone else or tell her that now, because she's complained, she'll get $10/hour and she'll do all the things she's asked to do (including playing with the children and taking them outside) and she'll do it without complaining- you're the boss, don't forget that. There are plenty of nannies out there- if you have to go through an agency, I'd do that (if you can't find someone otherwise). You'll most likely still pay less with an agency than you're paying her and they know their place (agency nannies). I've done agency and non-agency work.

2 moms found this helpful
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M.F.

answers from Houston on

We have a nanny that comes full time to the house. She does laundry, keeps the house tidy and plays with our son. We pay her much less than $12/hour. Wow! I know the "babysitting" rate in Houston is anywhere from $10-$15/hour - but the "nanny" rate is less than that.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.

answers from Dallas on

I am ananny and I work M-F from 8 to 4 and I get paid $325 per week or a little over $60 per day. I am only responsible for taking care of their 2 year old (and we stay as active as we can!)and I don't do any cleaning or laundry, etc. You should sit down with her and make a list of her responsibilities and the come to an agreement on payment. If her hours change frequently, you should try to only pay her by the hour, because that is only fair to you. If she is not even taking care of your kid, you might want to just get rid of her and start fresh with someone new. You can hire a housekeeper who will clean your entire house for $60! Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
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S.

answers from Dallas on

I am watching twins that are 2.5 The mother is paying me 50.00 a day for 2 days a week. She offered it. I provide everything for them and cook good meals for them. I have 2 friends who charge 100.00 a week in their home day cares. I don't know what your nanny is doing. I spend the whole time doing activities with the kids along with my 3 yr old. Coloring with them, doing puzzles, taking them out to play, counting and doing ABC'S..ECT. Whatever she is doing she should be concentrating on the child and not hanging out for a free easy pay day ride!

1 mom found this helpful
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T.W.

answers from College Station on

A suggestion for her or a future nanny is to make sure you put your expectations in writing. Call it a "Letter of Agrement". Make a list of what you want her to do from activities with the kids to chores around the house. You may even want to outline a schedule for the day. Include anything you can think of like pay, hours, extra pay for overtime, how often will raises be considered, ending the relationship... etc. This way you both have a tool for communicating.

I think the pay is up to you. We don't have a nanny, but we pay our babysitters more than the going rate. It keeps the good ones coming back and available.

Also, I know it is hard to communicate everything in these posts. But, I did notice that you talk about having her do activities with the kids and chores. Are you, your husband and nanny on the same page here? Which is more important - the kids activities or chores? As moms we know it is hard to balance both! As a SAHM I don't sit or watch t.v. during the day, but there are many days not all the chores get done because we went to the library or park or did an art project.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.C.

answers from Houston on

that is way to much. Think about it at a daycare you would pay about $100 per child and they feed them ,take them outside, clean them up, and help with studies if school age, teach them if their not. So $60 for one day and all she does is laundry, that's way to much i would start looking for another or see about daycares and goverment programs that can assist with daycare cost since your a one income family. I Texas Welfare will help with daycare cost and some daycares will have ways to help or places for you to go to get help. If the children are 3 years or older try enrolling them in head start or pre kindergarten its free or atleast cheap.

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N.

answers from Dallas on

I definitely think you are paying her too much for the once a week half day. I think $12/hour is fair for a nanny, IF they are good. If she's not really doing that much, than $12/hour is too much. Sounds to me like you need a new nanny. I'm sure there are many out there who would appreciate the steady work and who would love to take care of your children and your home for that kind of pay.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.M.

answers from Austin on

I agree with others here on the wage. I think that $12/hour is a maximum -- and for that you should expect the nanny to play with your child in a healthy developmental way (first priority) and do laundry, dishes, etc. (second priority).

Personally, I think you should find someone else. If you live near Austin, look for a college student through hire a longhorn. I've had very good luck with that.

1 mom found this helpful
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D.S.

answers from Dallas on

I was a nanny for two years here in the Dallas area, and have several other friends in the area that are nannies as well.

I definitely think the $12/hr is fair - and that is more than she was making when she worked 8:30-2pm. (aprox. $10.90/hr) Now that she is only working 3.5 hours, $60 is just over the top, and she was RUDE to complain about that. $45 for the 8:30-12pm shift would be perfect.

It is rare for nannies in the area make $15/hr... $10/hr and under is the norm, so she should be very greatful for what she has been getting.

Its times like these when a nanny contract would be a life saver!

1 mom found this helpful
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S.C.

answers from Houston on

Hi S.,

I actually live in Orange County Califronia, Laguna Beach but will be moving to Kingwood in a few weeks so I switched my Mamasource to Texas before we get there. I have had nannies for the last three years, and my last nanny that i just let go because I finally decided to be a stay at home mom, we paid her 12$ and hour. Now the cost of living here is much more (in some ways, we pay 10% income tax here!! it's unbelievable!) Anyway, my husband is being transferred to Houston. So here's what I learned. When I hired my last nanny I was working for Microsoft from home, so I was in the home at all times usually unless I had a doctors appt. etc. What I did was ask her to be a "Mother's Helper" meaning that whatever I needed her to do at any given time was what her job duties included. She is an absolute angel and since I was a manager I was able to create my own schedule and schedule my meetings that fit my schedule and wasn't at the beckon call of a boss. I paid by the hour only because some days, you just want to be with your children alone and you'd like to send them home! And who wants to pay for time not worked? So flat rates in my opinion are not a good idea. 60 dollars a half day is ridiculous, and I do not mean to sound offensive at ALL. Miss Alyse, is our nannies name, and she was told that our most important concerns were that our daughter go outside for excercise morning and afternoon, even for just and hour. The second concern was that her schedule was maintained to a tee. Now aside from these things, when it was raining or they had free time, my expectations (which were conveyed up front) were that she do crafts and other stimulating activities. But during our daughters nap, I actually ate lunch with her, or would let her nap on the couch, and even Tivo'd her favorite soap opera so that she could watch it then- that was ONLY if there wasn't laundry to be folded or something else quietly that she could do. Our nanny would take my daughter to the grocery store, I trusted her with my credit card and she would take it and do all of our family's shopping. My daughter loved to go to the store and it was a huge help for me. I also allowed her to take my daughter to the car wash, another thing she loved to do, for my nanny to get her car washed. Somedays, Miss Alyse would be sick, tired, or worn out, and we would switch roles, where I would take our daughter to the pool and Miss Alyse would cook dinner for us. Of course only the dinners that I taught her to make that our family ate. She would mop the floor, fold clothes, do all the dishes, and I absolutely expected that she clean up after any activities that they did together. This was heaven on earth. The point is, for 12 dollars and hour I had a beautiful young girl who loved my daughter and who my daughter adored, who would pick up what ever loose ends I couldn't handle, on top of looking after my daughter which was her first priority. This worked out beautifully and there really is something to be said for giving her the respect that she deserves, and I do not think you are not doing this, it's just some advice for your FUTURE nanny!!! Ask for a mother's helper, it's a great way to sort of outline the idea that you need HELP!! Not just a child's bodyguard. You need help around the house, with cooking, cleaning, and whatever other chores mothers do that take so much time and energy, hence why you need hired help. I would let her buy the things while she was at the store that she liked to eat, as well as let her look through craft books to let me know what I could purchase for her to have nice ideas for indoor activities, like magic mud, etc.
So, 10-12 dollars an hour is more than generous, because everyone needs to make a living, but make sure that you are getting your money's worth. My last and most important tip is make sure that you hire someone who does not have many "overhead" costs of their own. Our previous nanny was married with a mortgage and lots of bills, and once these people become part of your family, as they should being the caretakers of your children, I had an incident where Jacqui had a tree fall in her driveway during a storm and her insurance wouldn't cover it. She was in a position where she really needed money, and since I cared for her as a friend, I felt so guilty that I couldn't give her more money, but of course, we all have our own expenses, but it was a tough position. Miss Alyse was 23 years old, and lived with two other girlfriends, and pretty much only needed money to pay her rent, cell phone, utilities and gas, as well as clothes and getting her nails done- so she was ecstatic to be being paid 12/hr. That's how you want your nanny to feel, not that they are constantly in need of MORE money. The fact that your nanny was complaining is a very bad sign, and if she doesn't treat your children like the top priority (as if they were her own) by way of excercise and development, then she is not worth 10 dollars an hour.

It's very tricky to manage another woman in your home- but it is a two way street. You WANT to keep them happy because your most prized possesion is in their hands. But you also need to feel that you are secure finacially and that you feel your children are getting the best possible care out there.

I wish I could transport Miss Alyse to Texas because she just quit her job!!! We never gave her bonus' nor did we do benefits or paid holidays, but we were super cool when she was ill, or going on vacation, or just having a bad day.

I would ask any nanny for a resume, references, their ss#, ask them to sign a doc. allowing you to run a background check for driving records and (god forbid run-ins with the law) as well as spell out very EXPLICITLY what you'd like to have done around the house upfront!

It is possible to have a wonderful situation with a nanny in the home, but like I said, it's a two way street. You have to keep them happy and comfortable. And when this "cocktail" occurs, you will be in heaven for the help you are receiving.

When I let her go, I had to call her for weeks after asking her how to cook certain things as well as what our grocery list was, as I hadn't grocery shopped for my family in months.

I hope some of this advice helps. It sounds that you are being a bit taken advantage of, and that's not good. I am sorry to hear that. Please make the effort of finding the right fit for you, and then start enjoying life, besides, you are PAYING for it!!!

Take care,

S.

1 mom found this helpful
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E.P.

answers from Dallas on

S.,
Paying too much$$$$?!Uh yeah!!! I think you are paying her too much $$$$!!!! I watch children part-time now but I was a nanny for infant twins and was paid 10.00 an hour plus I kept the living room picked up and the cloths washed everyday I was there. Maybe you should put a FREE (Ilove that word haha)ad online (Star Telegram paper)and look for a new nanny.Or maybe you should show her on paper how much she is getting paid per hour and what she is doing for that pay is really not much (under worked and over paid). Try to talk to her first. If you need someone to watch your child part time or full time let me know. I have a spot open and we do a lot of fun things! I only have 3 part time kiddos and they NEVER want to go home ha ha. email me back if you want to talk. Good luck!!!!

Eliyah

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M.F.

answers from Houston on

Can I come work for you? Haha! Get a college kid that needs a lil' extra money to come and have fun with your little one. For less. I think 8-10 an hour is the going rate.

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A.M.

answers from Dallas on

The in home day care I take my son to 3 days a week is $35 a day from 8am -6pm and they feed him. He plays with other children,goes outside,and learns. The nanny I use on Saturdays to watch my 20 mo old while I care for my newborn (since my husband works on Saturdays) gets paid $50 to come from 8-12,leaves for a break,and then comes back from 3-5. This nanny does not clean or do laundry. She just plays with him, takes him for walks,feeds him, and puts him down for his nap. She is 19.
The cleaning lady we use gets paid $90 to come every 2 weeks from 10-2. She does laundry,mopping,dishes,vaccuming,scrubbing,etc. We have a big 2 story house.
Whenever we have a sitter, we pay them $10 an hour. My son is usually already asleep by the time the sitter gets here so they really just hang out incase he wakes up. However,now that we have 2, we pay $15 an hr if we leave the newborn at home.

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