Active 18 M That Is Starting Tantrums

I have a 13 month old little girl and man does she have a temper. She has been doing everything early. She had her first teeth at 3 months. She could say mama at 5 months. She was walking before she was 1. Once she started walking that's when the tantrums started. If she can't get her way she screams and cries. She is very smart. She knows how to get her way. It's her big blue eyes. When she starts having a tantrum I try to give her some choices of things she can have; if that doesn't work then I walk away and let her fuss. She stops real quick when she sees no one is giving in to her. It's hard to do, but I don't want her growing up thinking that throwing a fit is how we get what we want in life. Plus I just keep reminding myself that it's a part of being a kid and she'll grow out of it. So just remember to be patient.

Dear S., I had a daughter who threw tantrums and held her breath when she was little. It use to scare me that she was going hurt herself or stop breathing all together. But her doctor told me to let her alone and she would eventually breath even if she pasted out, to just ignore them and soon she quit after a few times she quit.Because she wasn't getting the response she was whating. I think if you ignore these fits that he is throwing he to will eventually quit. As long as you know he's not hungry, wet, or hurt,or just needs some personal time with mom and dad this should, I believe will work. Give it some time and patience. Please let me know if this works or not, I might have some other suggestions, as I also do childcare for my 18month granddaughter and we been working with her for the same things but her vocabulary is quite good. C. from dav.

I have a 17 mo going through the same thing. I've done some reading on this, it may be a little early for time outs. My oldest child went through this too. It is somewhat of a phase. Your child is trying to communicate, but can't do it effectively. As you can immagine, it is frustrating for them. I have started walking away from my daughter and letting her have the fit. I figure she will learn that a tantrum is not an effective way to communicate and learn other ways. Sorry I don't have any advise that will work overnight.

I'm in the same situation with my 15-month-old. He is also into everything and quite a bit more of a stinker than my oldest.
As hard as it is (and it seems nearly impossible sometimes) you have to stay calm when he throws his tantrums and let him work it out. Most of the time, tantrums are fueled by attention, thoso ignoring them (but still keeping an eye on him, of course) usually nips them in the bud.
At 18 months, he more than likely understands most of what you say whether he can verbalize back or not. My 15-month-old understands and is capable of following most instructions and responds to a lot of what I say, even though his speech vocabulary is limited. Even if he doesn't understand everything, talk to Quinton, ask him questions, have him show you what he wants, give him choices (i.e. do you want milk or water, do you want your ball or your book, etc.) to give him some sense of control, and don't be afraid saying no.
It sounds like you're doing a fantastic job already! Keep going with the time-outs and know that this is totally normal. I have a 5-year-old who still throws tantrums when he doesn't get what he wants and he has an above average vocabulary and absolutely no problem communicating. =)

Hi S.,

My daughter is also a very active at 19 montsh, who at 17 months start the 'terrible twos.' Pretty much what you said, tantrums from not getting their way or frustration. I have a short fuse so I have been working on being 'cool & calm' while me daughter is screaming and kicking.

If I take something away that she should not have, or say no to something she will throw herself on the floor and scream. In that situation I just walk away (with in a minute she will stop because she is not getting any attention).

In the case of unclear communication that is a tougher situation. If my daughter can not 'say' what she wants I ask her to point to it or I will start to pull things out that are her favorites. After a few minutes she is starting to lose it I tell her that we will try later once she calms down and we walk away from wherever we are. If she throws a fit I still walk away and she will follow in a few seconds. Usually in 10 mins we can go back and figure out what she was trying to get before hand... sometimes it is something that she should not have anyway (like candy) so we have another tantrum when I say no.

At my daughter's 18 month check up I asked the pediatrician about the tantrums and she said they usually start around 18 months (or whenever the child is starting to talk/communicate).

Over all if I feel I am getting 'anger/frustrated' with the situation I walk away and take a deep breath to calm myself and then go back. Other moms have told me that the calmer you are in the tantrum situation the easier it is for the child to learn how to handle the situation.